Grad anxiety

I have a beautiful little box that's been sitting on my vanity for the past two years. It's not an heirloom, nor particularly precious. It's made of paper. But I can almost smell the fresh rose scent that it used to hold.  It's just packaging for Fragonard soap -- and I've found excuses to use it long since the soap's run out.

That's the power of beautiful design. It's compelling, and at the same time entirely mundane -- its power lies in it's usefulness, like well-cut clothing.

I could write you a sonnet about the  day I bought that soap and it's box; about the emotions of finally leaving a country I'd dreamed of living in, about learning to deal with failure and being presented with death after trying so hard to escape it. About loneliness, and a rainy afternoon spent writing postcards to send far away in a pub two blocks from the Louvre where an exhibition of lists was being presented by Umberto Eco. An exhibition I'd come to see and needed to miss.

The memory's not the point - that's an entirely different subject.

The point is that such a simple, disposable (recyclable! even) object can do that, and I want to be able to create that kind of thing. I'm tired of my head. This abstract space where I write is so burnt out by these past years in j-school that I want to do something tactile, with images and geometry and colour, rather than write more now that I almost have the freedom to write what I want. (One month. Almost.)

I was looking at MFAs in design today. I spent most of the day buried in InDesign for the magazine project I'm working on as Art Director - a title I could really get used to. Maybe one day.

This is all just dreams for now.

old old fashioned

So now that school is (somewhat) over, I decided to expand a little etsy shop I opened back in January to try and sell off some of my old vintage. Really it's just that my closet is bursting - my boyfriend tried to get me to stick to the 'one thing out, one thing in' rule but I lasted maybe two days until I met a gentleman who hosted an amazing (and cheap!) vintage sale around school and I couldn't resist this amazing Kelly green wool dress... oops. (It didn't fit anyway, unfortunately, so it got sold.) Living two blocks from a great Salvation Army with a student discount doesn't help at all.

I'll warn you now that I'm not a very good hustler - I'm just terrible at selling, I'm too shy. This Christmas I helped my mum at her job in a chocolate shop and while she stood there booming away at people and cracking jokes and laughing (she organized an Easter egg hunt today for the kids in the neighbourhood around her shop), I was in the corner making boxes. I had to be sure all my bows were perfectly identical and all my chocolates were arranged in aesthetically nice ways... Mum's a playwrite/radio doc/book writer and went to the same Journalism school I'm at now, but we have very, very different approaches. She can get people talking, whereas I like dealing in pure information - pulling through financial statements? Government accounts? Parsing research? SO much fun.

With that in mind, I'm not going to try to take this too seriously - I'm not going to dump a tonne of stuff on etsy, I'm only going to put in the really gorgeous things that I know can be sold without much more effort than taking decent pictures and writing decent copy.

Everything else is going to Stepping Stones, and I already sell some of the more contemporary stuff at a great little consignment shop in Hali called Put Me On.

I'd love it if y'all stopped by to take a look! Use the code SPRINGING if you want 20% off.

there's a fire/burning in my ears

I love me a good crescendo and a booming blues-y backbeat:

LOVE the new album.

Plus there is also new PJ Harvey:

AND new Radiohead! My ears are completely spoiled this week.

ps. I wish I was a un-self-conscious as Thome York in this video, perhaps I would post more and put myself out a bit more. Alas, my Dad found this blog a little while ago (how, I have NO idea, he's on the other side of the country) and I got quite embarrassed. Rethinking the whole venture, again. I don't want to be embarrassed of it but I don't want to be so scared of posting that it all comes out rigid, yaknowwhatimean?

pps. Hi Dad!

How can I live in your world of ideas?

A few weeks ago I scribbled this out:

In a perfect coincidence, the winter boots I ordered came yesterday afternoon, and were immediately accompanied by our first snow! It was greyish all day, and once the bf got home we decided to head to the diner up the street for burgers and comfort food, me bouncing along in my new boots, of course. Literally the instant we stepped outside it started snowing; light, fluffy, wet snow-ball snow, not the sad dry stuff.

Waking up this morning to a slushy, melty layer about 10 centimetres deep was glorious, and I cannot wait to walk over to the cafe and school, slushing around, feet warm and happy. I already have an old pair of thick green rugby socks on in anticipation - they're my friend Alex's from a swap a few years a go. She thought I was a little crazy to take them, being that they were her old utilitarian over-shin-guard-type sport socks, and honestly they've been sitting useless in my closet for three years waiting for tall boots to wear with them. Now the wait is over! For snow, for boots, for using old nubby socks!

Honestly I've been looking for these boots since high school (ages a go), and finding them with the sole I'd wanted (rubber, for durability and anti-klutz properties) in the fabric and shaft height I'd wanted (tall, tall black suede) at only 5$ over the price I'd wanted (50$, they were 54$ with a discount) is a miracle. Even better, they fit. All I need now is a coffee and my day is complete - nothing can stop me from finishing my feature and paper. Evasive sources? Impossible deadlines? All history is nihilism? (wtf?!?) Helpless against these boots!

Yeah, I love me the simple stuff: boots & coffee. Heiddegger's at the bottom of the love-list (that paper about history/nihilism/nietszche/etc is being written now, eeeep)

On the bright side, I'm in the middle of making a mix for 8tracks, which is a really really great distraction!

The boom! The shortbread! The pre-Muppets Muppets!

SO I had this title saved as a draft with a photograph that no longer exists. I am super-duper curious about what that photograph was, but it's my own damn fault for not doing anything with this blog for nearly a year. Apologies all around, I promise I've still been reading all sorts of lovely blogs, maybe yours! I just haven't had the confidence (or sometimes the internet) to post, even while dragging my laptop all over Europe and a bit of Africa and to work once or twice at a ranch in the foothills.

Yeah, I just got it back from the shop. They replaced the whole case.

Anyway! Being back in academia, with a lovely range of courses to get my brain going and a boyfriend wonderful enough to do a lot of the cooking and free up a bit of time for me, expect some sort of regular posting to go on here. Seriously, he's making roast chicken and my favourite version of brussel sprouts right now. If I could send anyone who's reading this virtual smells/meals through the screen, I would.